Chuck Norris destroyed the Lord of Rings. Twice.
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When Chuck crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
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Chuck Norris has 12 moons.
One of those moons is the Earth.
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If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
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Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
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Chuck Norris doesn't need money he gets everything for free.
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Atlas doesn't drop the earth because he knows Chuck Norris lives in it.
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Chuck Norris can swim in an empty pool.
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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Some people like to eat frogs' legs.
Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs.
Hence, snakes.
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Charlie Sheen can achieve recovery by taking a drug called Chuck Norris.
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