Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
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Someone tried to stab Chuck Norris in the stomach, and the knife bent on his rock-hard abs.
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On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers.
He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
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Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls...
He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
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For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one.
For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one
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Chuck Norris saw the Invisible Man.
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Chuck Norris donates his beard clippings to the Army so they can make Kevlar vests.
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Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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Chuck gives the sun the chills.
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Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
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