Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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James Bond was trained by Chuck Norris, as his butler.
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Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
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Chuck Norris once raced light.
He is still waiting for it to catch up.
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Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
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The movie Unstoppable is based on Chuck Norris' morning jog.
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Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse.
He uses a lion.
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Chuck Norris has an Xbox Live account. On Playstation
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Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
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Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.
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Lactose is Chuck Norris intolerant.
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