Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Chuck Norris was once hospitalised, becaused he kicked his own ass.
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Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris?
The only good news is you know when you will die.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much.
Chuck Norris throws down!
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Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
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Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
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Chuck Norris can Moonwalk on the Sun.
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An ancient Chinese prophecy states that a man will be created to protect the lands from all evil.
Chuck Norris killed that man.
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Chuck Norris fell down the stairs and broke somebody elses leg.
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