Many years ago Chuck Norris and a brown bear had a fight. The loser had to go live in the north pole.
“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
Chuck Norris shot a man to death with an unloaded nerf gun.
The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.
Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart. The clerk told him to have a nice day. The next day the clerk was found dead. The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why. He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"