Many years ago Chuck Norris and a brown bear had a fight.
The loser had to go live in the north pole.
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The party only starts when Chuck Norris walks in.
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Trains stop at Chuck Norris crossings.
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Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute.
The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
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Chuck Norris once won the title of Iron Chef by cooking instant ramen noodles.
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Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
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Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?"
Chuck Norris is your daddy.
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Chuck Norris knows your reading this...
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.
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Chuck Norris can text using a rotary phone.
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