Chuck Norris once bench pressed an 18 wheeler.
With him inside it.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
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Chuck Norris can smoke underwater.
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Do you know Chuck Norris?
Yes?
Then he shall allow you to live... for now.
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Chuck Norris never dies.
And of course, he will also never fade away.
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Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
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Chuck Noris once got his blood tested.
His blood type was AK-47.
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The snake was punished because Chuck Norris tempted it to ate the apple.
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In the Matrix, the bullets try to dodge Chuck Norris - and fail.
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Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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