Chuck Norris once bench pressed an 18 wheeler. With him inside it.
The Statue of Liberty is alive, but Chuck Norris told her not to move.
When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
Q: What does Superman, Batman, and Ironman have in common? A: When they were kids they wanted to be Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once pushed a door that said,"pull."
Chuck Norris can make a rap video without booties and cars.
Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF! Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
The only reason world peace doesn't exist is because Chuck Norris doesn't feel like bringing peace to the whole world.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.