Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard?
He didn't, his beard grew him.
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How much white out does Chuck Norris use?
Don't be silly - Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.
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Even though Chuck Norris' lives in Dallas, Texas, his house still has spectacular views of both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
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There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
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Santa Claus goes to the mall to sit on Chuck Norris' lap.
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The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
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Chuck Norris can flush a port-a-potty.
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Chuck Norris turns his game off while saving.
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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
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When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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