Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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Chuck Norris actually went to Rome by all roads. At the same time.
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Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
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The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
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Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't contribute to global warming, he exhales pure oxygen.
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Chuck Norris does not require food, drink, shelter, or sleep, only confirmed kills.
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Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series.
We know it as Forged in the fire.
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Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
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Every 5 seconds, somewhere in the world, someone dies of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris does not know about this website.
If he did he would have just deleted the internet.
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