“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.
Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.
Those who ignore history, are doomed by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.
The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
Crest fights cavities, Chuck Norris kills them.
Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy. "There were no survivors."
Chuck Norris protects his body guards.