When Chuck Norris falls out of a boat , he dosn't hit water...
That's because Chuck Norris would never fall out of a boat it the first place.
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Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
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Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
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Shooting stars make a wish when they see Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord.
He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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What does the fox say?
Whatever the hell Chuck Norris tells him to.
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Q: Why are there prairies?
A: Because Chuck Norris scared the trees away.
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Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
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Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
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Do you know why the Earth's spinning ?
Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
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