Chuck Norris once had to go to court...the judge got life in prison.
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Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
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Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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When Chuck Norris has a bone to pick, it's always the jawbone.
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Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?"
Chuck Norris is your daddy.
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Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
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The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris.
It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
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