What did one skunk say to another?
And so do you.
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Q: What is red and black?
A: A sunburnt zebra.
The wild and mean bear grabs the hedgehog and asks him: "Were you at the fox’s party as well?"
"Yes, I was. So what?"
"Were you sitting on the table?"
"Yeah, why?"
The bear, ready to leg press him, changes his mind and says to the hedgehog: "Next time, wherever you go, take an umbrella with you!"
"But why, my friend?" the hedgehog wonders.
"Cause all night long, I was taking thorns off my ass!"
Q: What do you call a black and white thing rolling down a hill
A: A maori and a segull fighting over a fishhead.
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Why is there no gambling in Africa?
-Too many Cheetahs!
What do you get when a cow goes to the Beach with tanning oil?
Pre-tanned leather.
How do you f*ck a fat chick?
Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert?
A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
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"Why cant you play cards in the jungle?"
"Because theres to many cheetahs."
The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a Doberman and a Bulldog are in a bar having adrink when a great-looking female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me."
So the Doberman says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie replies, "That's not good enough."
The Bulldog says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says, "That's not creative enough."
Finally, the Chihuahua says, "Liver alone . . . cheese mine."