What did one skunk say to another?
And so do you.
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Johny's curriculum vitae:
1. Full name: John
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named as Redwing and the lizard named as Notail
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John
Vote:
Exasperated dragon on the field of battle: "Mother said there would be knights like this."
Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: "I really don't get how he can feed himself with that thing!"
Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat?
A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider?
A harenet.
Q: What do you call a horse that plays the violin in a musical?
A: Fiddler on the hoof.
Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks."
The other blonde looks and says "Those aren't deer tracks, those are wolf tracks."
"No. Those are deer tracks."
They keep arguing, and arguing, about half hour later they were both killed by a train.
Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup."
Waiter: "So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?"
Did you hear about the horse that has made a dozen films?
He's not a star though, he just does bit parts!