Chuck Norris thought 24 was a sit-com.
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Chuck Norris can "make it rain in Southern California".
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When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
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Chuck Norris lives in a Roundhouse...
And his favorite drink is punch...
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Chuck Norris can go Platinum on a Blank CD.
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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack.
His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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Chuck Norris won the gold, silver and bronze medals at the Olympics.
In the same event. From home.
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Chuck Norris once replied to a 'no-reply' mail, and got the answer he wanted.
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Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
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Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
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In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
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