Chuck Norris doesn't battle, he just allows you to lose.
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Lightening is too slow to strike Chuck Norris.
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Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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Fear of Chuck Norris is called logic.
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
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Chuck Norris once shot someone with a knife.
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Chuck Norris throws a dodgeball at you, knocks all your teeth out.
Then the ball hits you.
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Evolution ended the day Chuck Norris was born.
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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