Walker Texas Ranger was actually a reality show.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
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The Playstation Network is down because Chuck Norris unplugged his PS3.
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The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway.
But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.
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Scissors are told not to run with Chuck Norris.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people.
It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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People with Pogonophobia (fear of beards) do not fear Chuck Norris beard.
They are too scared of his entire existance to focus on 1 part.
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