Big Brother isn't watching you. Chuck Norris is watching you!
Chuck Norris has walked to the end of the universe and back.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it. Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris told his iPhone 2g it was a iPhone 4. He can now multi task and use face time.
Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
Chuck Norris broke the law once. It still isn’t fixed.
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
Chuck Norris was born Sept. 1 1945. World War 2 ended Sept. 2 1945. What a coincidence.