Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
Chuck Norris watched the entire Lord of the Rings without blinking.
Chuck Norris is the meaning of life. Too bad he's also the meaning of death.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Chuck Norris has walked to the end of the universe and back.
For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons. None of it is his own.
Why did we have a global recession? Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.