Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
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Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
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Lightening is too slow to strike Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Chuck Norris took a rocket science class but quit becaus it was too easy.
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Why does Chuck Norris have a beard?
A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
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Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shits out grizzly bears.
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It is better to give than to receive.
This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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