Chuck Norris can surf on lava.
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Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
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Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones but Chuck Norris' fists will kill you.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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All men are born equal.
Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
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Chuck Norris fills a 1-Liter Bottle With 2 liters of water.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need money he gets everything for free.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.
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There is no theory of evolution.
Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
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