Chuck Norris can surf on lava.
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Chuck Norris finds it impossible to understand the concept of impossibility.
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Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
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Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey.
The country there now is only an impostor.
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Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund
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Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Mickey mouse talks like that.
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Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one.
When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face.
We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
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Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
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The wind of Chuck Norris's round house kick can be felt from 1600 million miles away.
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Chuck Norris actually died 10 years ago.
The grim reaper just hasn't summed up enough courage to face Chuck Norris.
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