Chuck Norris can skydive into outer space.
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Chuck Norris invented half when he round house kicked the number 1
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Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Freddy Krueger sleeps with his mom every night because he is scared of Chuck Norris!
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Chuck Norris actually died a while back.
Death just can't get the nerve to tell him.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
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The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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Chuck Norris is so cool, ice cubes are jealous...
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Q: What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear?
A: Chuck Norris has more chest hair.
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