Chuck Norris can skydive into outer space.
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Chuck Norris took a nap.
The result was the Great Depression.
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Chuck Norris was born feet first.
It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.
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Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
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Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
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Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
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Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
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Chuck Norris dropped the apple on Isaac Newtons Head.
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Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
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Chuck Norris doesn't always drink beer, but when he does he has the dos equis guy serve it to him in a dress.
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If Chuck Norris misses a roundhouse-kick, you will still die.
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