When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.
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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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Chuck Norris was born feet first.
It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.
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Chuck Norris is like an F5 Tornado...
When you see him coming you better run for cover and pray to God he doesn't find you...
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Chuck Norris has an iPhone with whole apple.
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Chuck Norris never uses a navigation system.
The direction he is heading is ALWAYS the right direction.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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Some people have alter egos.
Chuck Norris has no such thing.
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Chuck Norris' guitar amp goes up to 12.
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When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
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Chuck Norris fell down the stairs and broke somebody elses leg.
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