Wanna party with me like you just don't care?
Put your hand up 45° in the air!
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The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
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I was invited to a party.
Suddenly I farted when an angry man shouted: "Why do you fart in presence of my wife?"
I only gazed him for some moments and calmly told him:"Sorry I didn't know it was her turn."
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Why did Hitler commit suicide?
He got the gas bill.
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Q: What is the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler?
A: Michael Phelps can finish a race.
Q: Why do walruses love a tupperware party?
A: They're always on the lookout for a tight seal.
What did the Boston Marathon bombers do that Hitler couldn't?
Ended a race.
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Yo mama so fat that she walked out to a party wearing heels and came back wearing flip-flops.
A big party is being held to honor relational database systems and their impact on modern society.
Outside the venue, the host awaits the guests.
The first limousine arrives and out steps Oracle followed by 4 people.
Host: Who have you brought along?
Oracle: I have 4 DBA's in tow. One to install me, one to design the databases, one to administer me, and the other to justify the cost.
A second limo arrives and out steps DB2 followed by 40 people.
Host: Who have you bought along?
DB2: I have 2 DBA's, 2 hardware specialists, and 36 consultants.
A third limo arrives and out steps SQL Server all on his own.
Host: Why haven't you brought anyone?
SQL Server: I didn't bring anyone because I am easy to install and am basically self managing. But I did bring the #sqlhelp Twitter hashtag for when the excrement hits the fan.
20 minutes later, up rushes MySQL, unshaved, hair a mess.
Host: Where have you been MySQL?
MySQL: Sorry, I thought it was February 31st.
Q: What was the one thing Hitler did well?
A: Kill himself.
I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word "Mother-in-law" you get the words "Woman Hitler".
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