A cop once pulled Chuck Norris over...Luckily, the cop left only with a warning.
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Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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If Chuck Norris ever got caught for speeding, he'd let the cops off with a warning.
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The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway.
But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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One Day Stupid, Trouble, and Shut Up were driving along in their car when Trouble suddenly hurled himself out of the window.
Well, Stupid and Shut Up did not know what to do so they went to the police station.
When they got there the chief asked them their names.
“Shut Up”, replied Shut Up.
“Stupid”, replied Stupid.
The police chief thought these people were telling him to shut up, and were calling him stupid.
Which made him very mad.
“Excuse Me!” shouted the chief.
Thinking the chief was hard of hearing, They once again shouted there names.
“Shut Up!”
“Stupid!”
The police chief was very riled.
He then asked” Are you looking for trouble?”!!!
Stunned at the idea of the chief knowing that they were looking for their friend, they replied,”Why yes, how did you know?”
A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car.
After looking the man over he says, "Sir,
I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot.
Have you been drinking?"
The man gets really indignant and says,
"Officer, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are glazed.
Have you been eating doughnuts?"
A policeman stops two drunks and asks one, "Where do you live?"
"Nowhere", the first drunk replied.
"And where do you live?", he asks the other.
"We're neighbours."
Your Mama's so black, when the cops were shooting at her, the bullets went back for flashlights.
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Chuck Norris ate once at Hard Rock Cafe.
It's now called Shakey's.
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Q: Two men are in a car. One of them is a Mexican while the other is black. Who is driving the car?
A: The cops.
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