Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist?
A: Cool music!
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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
I'm so hipster, even I've never heard of my favorite band.
Kind of surprised hipsters haven't started tying their beard's in man buns yet.
Q: What 80's rock band is banned from New Orleans and why?
A: The Scorpions. Every time they're in town, they rock you like a hurricane.
What did the black epileptic have written on his t-shirt?
"Help I'm not break dancing"
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I watched Justin Bieber get shot in CSI and my brother asked "Why are you crying?"
I said "Because he didn't die in real life"
10 things men don't say
1)Let's watch Lifetime.
2)Sex is overrated.
3)I don't want to go too far on the first date.
4)Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you.
5)Don't we owe your mother a visit?
6)I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down.
7)Dessert goes right to my hips.
8)I hate when I miss Oprah.
9)Does this suit make me look fat?
10)I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
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Yo mama so stupid she thought that 2 quarters were the famous singer every one said wow she's so "right".
Q: Why did Hitler hate golf?
A: Because he ended up in the bunker.
Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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