When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple.
Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
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When Chuck Norris visits Europe on vacation, France surrenders.
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Chuck Norris stem cells can reproduce missing limbs.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
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There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
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Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
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"Let bygones be bygones" is always subject to Chuck Norris' approval.
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Never tell Chuck Norris he lost the game because he will make you lose the game then roundhouse kick you in the face making you lose twice.
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