Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
Neil Armstrong was the first person to walk on the moon, Chuck Norris was the first person to walk on the sun.
Chuck Norris uses a gun to be humane.
Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
Charlie Sheen winning? Chuck Norris says "I think not."
Bigfoot thinks Chuck Norris is a myth
Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
Chuck Norris passed a kidney stone once. That stone is now known as The Death Star.
Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.
Chuck Norris can turn a vegan into a cannibal.