Facebook is like a fridge.
Every a few minutes you keep opening and closing it to see if there's anything good in it.
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Anyone remember the good old days before Facebook, Instagram and Twitter?
When you had to take a photo of your dinner, then get the film developed, then go around to all your friends' houses to show them the picture of your dinner?
No?
Me neither.
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Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
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If you need Facebook to remind you it's your wife's birthday, I hope you own a comfortable couch.
Boss comes up to an employee:
"Yesterday you did a great job - in one day you managed to do as much work, as you did in previous month!"
"Thanks boss, that's because Facebook was shut down for the whole day."
I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it.
And it will say Nobody Likes This.
Google+ is the gym of social networking.
We all join, but nobody actually uses it.
A new study found that more than 11 million people have quit Facebook in the last three years.
And unfortunately, none of them were your parents.
Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
I'm going to change my Facebook name to Benefits.
Now, when someone adds me on Facebook, it will say: you are now friends with Benefits.
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Chuck Norris can check his facebook on a typewriter.
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