Joke #1388

What do you call a handcuffed man? Trustworthy.
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has 24.15 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men

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There's 3 army generals and the government decides to pay them any way they want measured. First guy says measure from the tip of my toe to the end of my finger. So they do and its 73 inches so they pay him $730,000. The second guy does the same and gets paid $650,000. The third guy goes measure from the tip of my penis to the back of my balls. They say OK drop your pants, so he does and they measure. "You have no balls" they say. "Yes I do," he replies, "they're still in Vietnam.
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: men
A boyfriend asks his girlfriend: "What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?" "Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it…"
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has 66.75 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: men, relationship, time, Valentines day
A man, during his night prays, asks God: "Oh, Lord... Why you’ve made women so beautiful?" God replies: "So you can love them, my child." "Fine, but my Lord, why you’ve made them so stupid?" "So that they can love you back, my child...!"
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has 78.06 % from 219 votes. More jokes about: beauty, god, love, men, stupid
There is a beautiful desert island in the middle of nowhere where the following people are stranded: 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman 2 French men and 1 French woman 2 German men and 1 German woman 2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman 2 English men and 1 English woman 2 Macedonian men and 1 Macedonian woman. One month later on this beautiful desert island in the middle of nowhere... The first Italian man killed the other for the Italian woman. The 2 French men and the French woman are living happily together in a "menage a trois". The 2 German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman. The 2 Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them. The 2 English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman. The Macedonian men took one look at the endless ocean, one look at the Macedonian woman and started swimming.
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has 66.49 % from 274 votes. More jokes about: desert island, ethnic, men, women
I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".
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has 68.60 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, men, music, relationship
Susan was having a tough day and after returning home she started complaining. She said to her husband, "Nobody loves me….nobody cares for me..the whole world hates me!" Her husband, watching TV said casually: "That’s not true dear. You are not that famous that whole world hates you. Some people don’t even know you."
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has 73.91 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: husband, love, men
What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home.
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has 51.34 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men
Mattel is coming out with a talking Barbie. They say it was easy to get Barbie to talk. The problem was getting Ken to listen.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: men
"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something."
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men
What's the biggest difference between men and women ? Men are crabby all month long.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: men