Joke #278

Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to drop off, otherwise they are all going to fall. They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, and for men in general, without ever getting anything in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands.

He: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way. She: Well, you succeeded.

A beautiful woman who had a golden little plane necklace was seated next to a guy on the plane. During the flight all the time he was gazing at the necklace. When the woman asked him: "Are you interested in my necklace?" "No lady; I would rather its runway!" answered the guy.

Q: What is difference between man and Superman? A: Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.

Boy: "Hey baby, what's your sign?" Girl: "Do Not Enter!"

What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man? Big Foot's been spotted several times.

Knock knockrn Who's there? Woman who? Wo-man you where so nice to let me tell you this joke Knock knock. Who's there? Man. Man who? Man you where so nice to let me tell you this joke.

I’ve know John a long time and am considered a bit of a father figure to him. I have watched him crawl around on his knees, drink from a bottle and I’ve cleaned up after him but enough about the Bachelor Party.

If you catch a man…throw him back.

How do you know if a man is lying? His lips are moving!

Two men walked into a restaurant, the first one asks for tea. The second also asks for tea. "And make sure the glass is clean," he tells the waiter. When the waiter returns with the two glasses of tea he asks, "Which one of you asked for the clean glass?"