Joke #1622

Did you hear about the two lesbians who bought an organ so they could play hymns?

What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 government employees in one room? 100 people that don''t do dick!

How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters? All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.

What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders.

Why did the little Greek boy run away from home? He didn't like the way he was being reared.

Q: What do you call a lesbian with a big tongue? A: Well hung.

By the time a Marine pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or just a bed, I don't care where." "Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, a Navy guy," admitted the manager, "and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you." "No problem," the tired Marine assured him. "I'll take it." The next morning the Marine came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "How'd you sleep?" Asked the manager. "Never better." The manager was impressed. "No problem with the other guy snoring, then?" "Nope, I shut him up in no time." Said the Marine. "How'd you manage that?" asked the manager. "He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room," the Marine explained. "I went over, gave him a kiss on the cheek, said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me."

A gay couple had been partnered for 25 years and was celebrating the 60th birthday of one of them. During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each. The one who was giving the party said, "We've blown all our money on parties and fine dining and decorating this house, I've never gotten to see the world. I wish we could travel all over the world." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He had the tickets in his hand. Next, it was the birthday boy's turn. He paused for a moment, and then with a sly grin said, "Well, I'd like a boyfriend 30 years younger than me." The fairy waved her wand and POOF! He was 90.

Q: What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? A: Snap-on tools!

What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A fruit stand.

Man comes home from work to find his boyfriend whacking off into a condom. Man says, "WTF?" Boyfriend says, "I am making you a sack lunch!"