Did you hear about the two lesbians who bought an organ so they could play hymns?
What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 government employees in one room? 100 people that don''t do dick!
How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters? All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.
What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders.
What’s the difference between a straight woman and a bisexual woman? 4 drinks.
How can you tell a tough lesbian bar? Even the pool table has no balls.
Man comes home from work to find his boyfriend whacking off into a condom. Man says, "WTF?" Boyfriend says, "I am making you a sack lunch!"
What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See ya next month.
Q: Why did they make glow in the dark condoms? A: So gay guys can play star wars.
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.
Two lovers fall on hard times and decided to rob a bank together. The first lover plans the robbery and goes over the plan with the second lover in great detail. The robbery begins. The first lover drives up in front of the bank, stops the car and says to the other lover, "I want to make absolutely sure you understand the plan. You are supposed to be in and out of the bank in no more than three minutes with the cash. Do you understand the plan?" "Perfectly," he said. He goes in the bank while the other waits in the getaway car. One minute passes, two minutes pass...seven minutes pass - and the first lover is really stressing out. Finally, the bank doors burst open and out he comes. He's got a safe wrapped up in rope and is dragging it to the car. About the time he gets the safe in the trunk of the car, the bank doors burst open again with the security guard coming out. The guard's pants and underwear are down around his ankles while he is firing his weapon. As the guys are getting away, the first lover says "I thought you understood the plan!" The second lover said, "I did! I did exactly what you said!" "No, you idiot," he replied. "You got it all mixed up. I said tie up the GUARD and blow the SAFE!"