How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters?
All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.
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What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 government employees in one room?
100 people that don''t do dick!
What do you call two lesbians in a canoe?
Fur traders.
Did you hear about the two lesbians who bought an organ so they could play hymns?
Q: What do you call a lesbian with a big tongue?
A: Well hung.
How do lesbians handle their liquor?
By the ears.
(Lick her)
Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted?
A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
Q: Why was the lesbian sick?
A: She was lacking vitamin D.
Gays don't fart - their asses fetch a sigh.
Once upon a time, there was a king who thought that his officers were going to try to have sex with his queen.
So he made all of his officers put on tight pants and told them that if anyone got a boner their head would be chopped off.
So he lined them up and the queen came to the first one and took off her gown.
He got a boner, so that was the end of him.
Then she came to the next one and took off her gown, he got a boner and that was the end of him.
This went on until she came to the last one and took off gown, then her underthings and he didn't get a boner.
So she took off his clothes and started rolling on the floor with him, half an hour went by, then an hour, finally after two hours the king came in to see what was happening and as soon as the king came in the guy got a boner.
Two gay men are walking down the street trying to bum a ride.
A truck driver picks them up.
After a while the first gay man asked in a very gay voice, "Please sir can I fart?"
The truck driver then says, "Yeah sure who cares."
So the gay guy goes "POOF".
Then the second gay man asks if he can fart. The truck driver says he doesn't care and the second gay man went ''poof''.
Then the big truck driver goes to the gay men and says, "Ok gentlemen can I fart?"
The gay men say right on and the truckdriver lets it blow.
The fart was huge and smelly and loud.
The gay men then say, "He is obviously a virgin."
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