How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters? All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.
What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 government employees in one room? 100 people that don''t do dick!
What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders.
Did you hear about the two lesbians who bought an organ so they could play hymns?
Q:How do you know when you are at a gay picnic? A:When all the hot dogs taste like shit!
One day a nun was standing on the side of the road waiting for a cab. A cab stopped and picked her up. During the ride she noticed that the driver was staring at her. When she asked him why, he said, "I want to ask you something, but I don't want to offend you." She said, "You can't offend me. I have been a nun long enough that I have heard just about everything." The cab driver then said, "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun give me a blow job." She said, "Well, perhaps we can work something out under two conditions.You have to be single, and you have to be Catholic." Immediately the cab driver said, "Oh, yes!I'm single and I'm Catholic!" The nun said, "Okay, pull into that alley." The cab driver pulled into the alley and the nun went to work. Shortly afterwards, the cab driver started crying. The nun said, "My child, what's the matter?" He said tearfully, "Sister, I have sinned. I lied, I lied...I'm married and I'm Jewish!" The nun replied, "That's okay. My name's Bruce and I'm on my way to a costume party!"
Q: Why was the lesbian sick? A: She was lacking vitamin D.
Q: What do you call a lesbian with a big tongue? A: Well hung.
Q: Do you know the most favourite play of gays? A: Romeo and Julius.
Q: What do you call a lesbian with eight girlfriends? A: An octopus.
Two couples decide to spend the weekend away together at a posh hotel. When they get there, one guy suggests they indulge in partner-swapping as a trial. After 2 hours of solid sex by the fireside, the guy turned to his new partner and said, "Wow! This is the very best sex I've had in years! I wonder how the girls are doing?"