How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters?
All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.
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What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 government employees in one room?
100 people that don''t do dick!
What do you call two lesbians in a canoe?
Fur traders.
Did you hear about the two lesbians who bought an organ so they could play hymns?
A married couple was on holiday in Pakistan they were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop.
From the inside they head a Pakistani accent say, "you foreigners come in.
Come in my humble shop." so the married couple walked in.
The Pakistani man said to them, "I have some special sandals I think you'd be interested in.
They make you wild at sex like a great dessert camel"
Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man had claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being a sex hero he as.
The husband, "how could sandals make you into a sex freak?"
The Pakistani man replied, why don't you see for yourself?"
Well , the husband after much badgering from his wife, finally conceded to try them on.
As soon as he slipped then onto this feet, he got this wild look in his eyes, something his wife hadn't seen in years-- raw sexual power.
In a blink of an eye the husband rushed of too the Pakistani man threw him on the table and started tearing at the guy's pants.
All the time the Pakistani man was screaming, "YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET"
Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church?
A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.
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A gay couple had been partnered for 25 years and was celebrating the 60th birthday of one of them.
During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them one wish each.
The one who was giving the party said, "We've blown all our money on parties and fine dining and decorating this house, I've never gotten to see the world.
I wish we could travel all over the world."
The fairy waved her wand and POOF!
He had the tickets in his hand.
Next, it was the birthday boy's turn.
He paused for a moment, and then with a sly grin said, "Well, I'd like a boyfriend 30 years younger than me."
The fairy waved her wand and POOF!
He was 90.
Someone asked me how I view Lesbian relationships. Apparently, "in HD" wasn't the correct answer.
Q: How can you tell if a lesbian is butch?
A: She kick starts her vibrator and rolls her own tampons.
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Q: What's the difference between a cook and a gay?
A: The cook stirs today's lunch, whereas the gay stirs yesterday's dinner.
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