Joke #1801

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
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Chuck Norris can check his pulse by same hand.
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Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
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There are no bombs, Chuck Norris just jumps out of a helicopter and punches the ground.
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Where does the devil go when he dies? He goes to Chuck Norris for an eternity of roundhouse kicks.
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I got a tattoo of Chuck Norris on my own leg... now it won't stop roundhouse kicking me in the face.
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2012 is the predicted date for the end of the world. The only rational explanation is Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap. When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
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If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
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Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat. His body cries.
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