Chuck Norris once won a drag race with a unicycle.
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If Chuck Norris movies were in 3D, the audience would be dead.
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Bill Gates lives in fear Chuck Norris' PC will crash.
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Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
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Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids.
Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
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Chuck Norris does not go fishing, the fish surrender.
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Chuck Norris once hit 3 touchdowns during a friendly game of full-contact bowling.
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With the rising cost of gasoline, Chuck Norris is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
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There is no such thing as an endangered species, they are Chuck's likes and dislikes.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t shave; he kicks himself in the face.
The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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