Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
Chuck Norris once starred in Wheel of Fortune. The last twenty nine minutes were spent in an awkward silence, waiting for the wheel to stop spinning.
Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple. Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, we beats the water into submission.
Local mountain lions have been complaining about the recent string of Chuck Norris attacks.
Two things in life are certain: Death and a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
If looks could kill they would be called Chuck Norris.
"Let bygones be bygones" is always subject to Chuck Norris' approval.
Chuck Norris turns his game off while saving.