Joke #2249

"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something."
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Women prefer the simple things in life… like men.
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Q. Why were men given larger brains than dogs? A. So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
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Warning ladies! Never trust a man who calls you "SEXY". This is why. When he removes the letter 'Y' it means you're down for "SEX". After sex, he will remove the letter "S" and start calling you his "EX".
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A family went to a nudist camp for their vacation. The young son came back to the tent and said, "Wow, Mom! You should see some of those girls. They've got these HUGE..." "Yes, well," his mother sniffs. "The larger they are, the dumber the woman." Next day the boy comes back to the tent again. "You wouldn't believe some of the guys out there. They have these HUGE..." "Yes, well, like I said, the bigger they are, the dumber the man." "Really?" the boy said, frowning with puzzlement. "We might be in trouble, Mom." "Why, honey?" "Because Dad's out there talking to a really stupid girl, and he's getting dumber by the minute."
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What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man? Big Foot's been spotted several times.
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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."
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One day Dan asks Bob, "So Bob what did you get for Christmas?" Then Bob says to Dan, "Oh see that brand new red Ferrari outside?" Dan says, "OOOOH WOW! Bob says, "Ya, I got the same exact color tie!"
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Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
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A true gentleman holds the door for his woman... then smacks her ass as she walks by.
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What did God say after she made Eve? "Practice makes perfect."
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