There was a terrible tragedy concerning the local ice hockey team.
They drowned during spring training.
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Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music?
Matthew: Why?
Peter: Because he broke the record!
Yo'Mama is so stupid, she threw a baseball at Batman.
I thought I told you to lose weight.
Says the coach.
What happened to your three week diet that I told you to keep?
Well, I finished it in three days!
Why do golfers wear two pairs of trousers?
In case they get a hole in one!
Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
Q: Why doesn't Mexico have any teams competing in the Olympics?
A: Because all of the Mexicans that can run, swim, and jump have left the country.
Vote:
Q:What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?
A:Santa stops after three hos.
Our new midfielder cost ten million.
I call him our wonder player.
How come?
Every time he plays I wonder “why the fuck did I bothered to buy him”!
Football match Romania – Russia.
Romania wins and receives a telegram from Russia:
“You’ve won!
Stop.
Congratulations!
Stop.
Oil!
Stop.
Gas!
Stop...
One day, the Devil challenged the Lord to a baseball game.
Smiling the Lord proclaimed,
"You don't have a chance; I have Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle, and all the greatest players up here".
"Yes", snickered the devil, "but I have all the umpires."