Two programmers in a bar:
Do you see that chick there?
Look at here “properties”!
Yes, I’ve already “tested” here last night... they are read-only!
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Chuck Norris invented the internet so that he could reach his enemies, preferably ninjas.
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A Microsoft support technician goes to a firing range.
He shoots ten bullets at the target 50m away.
The supervisors check the target and see that there’s not even a single hit.
They shout to him that he missed completely.
The technician tells them to recheck, and gets the same answer.
The technician then aims the gun at his finger and shoots, blasting it off.
He shouts back, ‘It’s working fine here!
The problem must be at your end!’
A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
A system administrator has 2 problems:
- dumb users
- smart users
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Q: Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas?
A: Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
The extra RAM slots have tractor parts stored in them.
Q: What's the Internet's favorite animal?
A: The lynx.
Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
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James Bond got this email from a friend:
CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?
Once upon a time, a computer programmer drowned at sea.
Many were on the beach and heard him cry out, “F1! F1!”, but no one understood.
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