Where does the acronym LOTUS come from? Let Only Users Suffer.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
The web isn’t better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.
Why did the computer get cold? Because it forgot to close windows.
Do files get embarrassed when they’re unzipped?
Q: What is height of Craziness? A: Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.
Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
Daddy, how was I born? Ah, very well, one day you need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room on MSN. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber cafe. We snuck into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from your dad's memory stick. As soon as dad was ready for an upload, it was discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall. Since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later the blessed virus appeared. And that's the story.
Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, they just declare darkness the standard!
What goes ‘choo choo choo’ while online? Thomas the search engine.
Q: How can you tell a blonde's been using the computer? A: There's white-out all over the screen.