We love Facebook but we hate the face of book.
Status I didn't fall down, I attacked the floor.
I'm going to change my Facebook name to Benefits. Now, when someone adds me on Facebook, it will say: you are now friends with Benefits.
Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
A client calls to hotline of internet service provider: "I have a problem, internet stopped working two days ago, neither I nor my son nor anyone else can access it now..." "I see, do you know what's the operating system on your PC?" "Of course, I do - it's Facebook..."
I forgot to post on Facebook I was going to the gym. Now this whole workout was a waste of time.
Chuck Norris has a Roundhouse Kick button on his Facebook page, and when he deletes a friend they actually die.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Pornhub is Down, your mums Facebook will do.
Chuck Norris got added by facebook itself.
Q: How do you get 15,000 followers? A: Run through Africa with a water bottle.