Q. Why don't lions eat clowns?
A. Because they taste funny.
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Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin.
Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
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What do cows like to listen to?
Moo-sic.
Who robs banks and squirts ink?
Billy the Squid.
What did the bunny want to do when he grew up?
Join the Hare Force.
I have asked my mamma: "Mamma, why do we have 10 cock birds but only 1 hen?"
Mama has said to me: "Because I want that she has a better life than I had."
Bill O'Reilly and his chauffeur accidentally hit and kill a farmer's pig while driving through the country.
O'Reilly tells the chauffeur to apologize to the farmer.
They drive up to the farm, and the chauffeur goes inside.
He is gone for a long time.
When the driver returns, he explains his long absence, "Well, first the farmer shook my hand, then he offered me a beer, then his wife made me some cookies, and his daughter showered me with kisses."
"Why were they so grateful?" O'Reilly asks.
The chauffeur replies, "I don't know. All I told him was that I was Bill O'Reilly's driver and I'd just killed the pig."
Q. What’s got 4 legs and bleeds?
A. Half a spider!
Q. Why did Mrs. Smokey the Bear divorce Smokey the Bear?
A. Because every time she got hot, he d beat her with a shovel!
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.