Men and women were created equal but women continued to improve.
Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.
Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
A man is moaning to his mate that he never has any luck with pulling women. His mate tells him he has a chat up line that never fails, no matter how good looking the women are he always ends up in bed with them. Great says his mate, what is it! Just walk up to any woman you fancy and say, "Excuse me love, could I ask your opinion! Does this damp piece of cloth smell like chloroform to you?"
Why do men name their penises? Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the one who makes all their decisions.
What is a man's idea of foreplay? A half hour of begging.
Definition of a man with manners – he gets out of the bath to pee.
Q: Why was the blonde girl's belly button bruised? A: Because blonde men are dumb too.
A drunk guy took a cat home to his wife and said: "See... here is the a monkey of the jungle." His wife said laughing, "That's a CAT ..." He said back to his wife, "I am talking to the cat!"
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman? A: Too close to the gas chamber.