When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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Chuck Norris sends paper letters through email.
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Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
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Chuck Norris just completed a full round of Golf... In 17 shots.
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Chuck Norris' keyboad has no delete key.
Chuck Norris never makes a mistake!
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In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep.
Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus and the jeep.
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Most leading hand sanitizers say that they can kil 99.99% of all germs.
Chuck Norris can kill 100% of WHATEVER HE WANTS.
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When Chuck Norris wears a mood ring, it doesn't say whether he's happy or sad.
It says he's Chuck Norris.
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The Mayans predict that Chuck Norris going to roundhouse kick this earth in the year 2012.
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When Chuck Norris hired his bodyguards, he figured he was paying to save someone.
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Chuck Norris' jokes don't have punchlines.
They have footprints.
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