When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids. Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
When Chuck Norris was a kid, he entered a pool bombing competition. This place now widely known as the Niagara Falls.
Chuck Norris actually died 10 years ago. The grim reaper just hasn't summed up enough courage to face Chuck Norris.
Bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
When Chuck Norris' dreams come true, your worst nightmares begin.
There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.
Chucks Norris's mirror is scared to look at him.
Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.