Chuck Norris can pop scissors with a balloon.
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Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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Did you know the Dinosaurs crossed Chuck Norris?
But only once.
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Chuck Norris has the iPhone 5...he got it back in '84.
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When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the weights get stronger.
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The truth hurts dosen't it, Chuck Norris' truth kills.
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Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
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A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
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The reason Tom Cruise runs in all his movies is because he's running the hell away from Chuck Norris.
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