Chuck Norris not only speaks in the third person, he sees in the third person.
Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
Chuck Norris does not know about this website. If he did he would have just deleted the internet.
In high school, Chuck Norris was voted "Most."
Why does Chuck Norris have a beard? A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.
Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
When the metal detector goes off at the airport, it is just verifying Chuck Norris walked through.
Chuck Norris once stared death in the face... Death pissed his pants.
Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.