Chuck Norris not only speaks in the third person, he sees in the third person.
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Chuck Norris can blow a tornado away.
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Chuck Norris doesn't vote.
He elects!
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Yoda used to be 6 feet tall till he tried that Force crap on Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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Chuck Norris once beat the sun at a staring contest.
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Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs.
Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
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The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real.
It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a will.
Invincible people don't need them.
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Arnold Schwarzenegger always says he'll be back.
But Chuck Norris always handles things the first time
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