How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
You hold his nose!
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Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
Yo momma is so hairy when she lifts her armpit up it looks like she's got Bigfoot in a headlock.
What do you call a gigantic polar bear?
Nothing, you just run away.
What's green green green green green?
A frog rolling down a hill.
Where do steers go to dance?
To the Meat Ball.
While standing in front of the gorilla's cage, a gust of wind swept some dust into his eye. As he rubbed his eyelid, the gorilla went crazy, bent open the bars, and beat the guy senseless.
When the guy came to his senses, he reported the incident to the zookeeper. Nodding, the zookeeper explained that pulling down your eyelid means "Fuck you! " in gorilla language. The explanation didn't make the victim feel any better and he vowed revenge.
The next day he purchased two large knives, two party hats, two party horns, and a large sausage.
Putting the sausage in his pants, he hurried to the zoo and over to the gorilla's cage, where he tossed a hat, a knife, and a party horn.
Knowing that gorillas were natural mimics, he put on a party hat.
The gorilla looked at him, looked at the hat, and put it on. Next, he picked up his horn and blew on it. The gorilla picked up his horn and did the same.
Then the man picked up his knife, whipped the sausage out of his pants, and sliced it in half.
The gorilla looked at the knife, looked at his own crotch, looked at the man, and pulled down his eyelid."
Q: Why don't black kids play in sand boxs?
A: Because they are affraid the cats will try to cover them up.
What do you call a dinosaur drinking Tequila?
Tyrannosaurus Mex.
Rabbit: "Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?"
Doctor: "Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another."