Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.
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A man enters a store and says: "15 litres of wine please."
"Did you bring a container for this? "
"You're speaking to it."
"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something."
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman?
A: Too close to the gas chamber.
A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother.
On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"
"Of course not, dear," replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"
"The tombstone back there said...
'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'
What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
A man walking down the streets sees another man with a very big dog.
One man says to the other, "Does your dog bite?"
The man replies, "No my dog doesn't."
The man pats the dog and has his hand bitten off, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite" said the injured man.
"Thats not my dog", replied the other.
Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
If guys had they periods, they would compare the size of their tampons.
After an accident...
1st Driver : I flashed the headlights and told you to let me go first.
2nd Driver : I also started the wipers and said NO NO...