Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.
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What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.
How do you know a man is really a bad dancer?
When he can still step on Dolly Parton's toes.
A nude guy was sunbathing at the beach, a little girl comes to him, he covers his private parts with a newspaper.
The little girl asks, "hats under there?"
So the man answers , "A bird..."
The girl goes away & the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital & in alot of pain.
A doctor comes up to his bed & asks, 'What happened?'
The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach & fell asleep after talking to a little girl."
So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses.
When they got there, they see the little girl the man was talking about.
So they ask her if she did anything to the man...?
She answers, "I din't do anything to the man, but he was sleeping, I played with his bird, After a while, it spat at me, so i broke its neck, burnt its nest, and smashed all its eggs!"
Q: What do you get when you cross a penis and a potato?
A: A dic-tater.
Why do men like masturbation?
It's sex with someone they love.
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
Vote:
How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
In the beginning, God created Earth and then rested.
After that, He creaed man and rested.
Then God created woman.
Since then, neither God nor man got ever rested.
I had to divorce my husband for religious reasons,
I'm a catholic and living with him is hell.