Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.
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In the beginning, God created Earth and then rested.
After that, He creaed man and rested.
Then God created woman.
Since then, neither God nor man got ever rested.
Two factory workers are talking.
The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off."
The man replies, "And how would you do that?"
The woman says, "Just wait and see."
She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.
The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?"
The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb."
The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off."
The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?"
The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
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Husband admiring his body in the mirror says to wife "look at that, 14 stones of pure dynamite !"
Wife replies "yeah, shame about the 2 inch fuse..."
Do you know why bankers are good lovers?
They know first hand the penalty for early withdrawal.
Every man thinks he's a dream of every woman.
Sorry guys, but the dream of every woman is eating all the time and not to get fat.
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship?
Telling you his real name.
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Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeders, a State Policeman sees a car puttering along at 22 miles per hour.
He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"
So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver...