Joke #3474

Mattel is coming out with a talking Barbie. They say it was easy to get Barbie to talk. The problem was getting Ken to listen.
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men

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Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian?" "Yeah," says the other cowboy.  "Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction."  Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon." "Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what colour they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"  The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a half hour ago."
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has 57.98 % from 178 votes. More jokes about: animal, cowboy, life, men, women
A family went to a nudist camp for their vacation. The young son came back to the tent and said, "Wow, Mom! You should see some of those girls. They've got these HUGE..." "Yes, well," his mother sniffs. "The larger they are, the dumber the woman." Next day the boy comes back to the tent again. "You wouldn't believe some of the guys out there. They have these HUGE..." "Yes, well, like I said, the bigger they are, the dumber the man." "Really?" the boy said, frowning with puzzlement. "We might be in trouble, Mom." "Why, honey?" "Because Dad's out there talking to a really stupid girl, and he's getting dumber by the minute."
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has 83.74 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: men
Men come in three sizes: Small, medium, and OOoohhh yesss!
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has 28.45 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
Once there were three men, Dave, John, and Sam, who were involved in a tragic car accident in which all three died. As they stood at the gates of heaven St. Peter came up to them and said, "You will all be given a method of transportation for your eternal use around heaven. You will be judged on your past deeds, and will have your transport chosen accordingly." St. Peter looked at Dave and said, "You, Dave, were a bad man. You cheated on your wife four times! For this, you will drive around Heaven in an old beat up Dodge." Next St. Peter looked at John and said, "You, were not so evil, but you still cheated on your wife two times. For this, you will forever travel around heaven in a Toyota stationwagon." St. Peter finally looked at Sam, and said, "You, Sam, have set a fine example. You did not have sex until after marriage, and you never cheated on your wife! For this, you will forever travel through heaven in a Ferrari." A short time later, Jon and Dave pulled up in their cars next to Sam’s Ferrari and there he is, sitting on the hood, head in hands, crying. "What’s wrong, Sam?" they asked. "You got the Ferrari! You are set forever! Why so down?" Sam looked up, ever so slowly opened his mouth and cried, "I just saw my wife go by on a skate board."
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has 78.18 % from 179 votes. More jokes about: car, death, heaven, marriage, men
How do men sort their laundry? "Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable".
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has 78.15 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: men
A man goes to the doctor with a piece of lettuce dangling from his rectum. "That looks nasty," says the doctor. "Nasty?" the man says. "That's just the tip of the iceberg."
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: doctor, men
What did God say after creating man? I can do better.
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has 56.40 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: god, men
Men are like.....Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: men
How does a man show he's planning for the Future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
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has 27.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: beer, men
How was Colonel Sanders a typical male? All he cared about were legs, breasts, and thighs.
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has 28.61 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men