What did the dog say to the hot dog bun?
"Are you pure bred?"
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Q: Why do cops arrest black people?
A: Because monkeys belong in cages.
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That tornado damage your cow barn any?
Dunno.
Haven't found the durn thing yet.
Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row.
The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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There was a hysterical call at the fire department, and it went like this: "Help me, please help me! There is a cat meowing and yowling with frequency and urgency. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you please help me, and send the fire squad right away?"
"Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax wait until he leaves."
"You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!"
"Cats aren’t like snakes or spiders that are poisonous, by the way who is calling?"
"I’m Josephine’s parrot you jerk!"
"Help me please, please help!"
What do you call a lion wearing a cravat and a flower in its mane?
A dandy lion.
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle?
It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
What does a bunny use when it goes fishing?
A harenet.
Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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