Joke #3571

What did the dog say to the hot dog bun? "Are you pure bred?"
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
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has 57.16 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, wedding
Bert took his Saint Bernard to the vet. "Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail." The vet stepped back, "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?" "Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."
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has 73.41 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor, mother in law
Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender… "Pour me a stiff one – just had another fight with the little woman." "Oh yeah?" said Charlie "And how did this one end?" "When it was over," Mike replied, "she came to me on her hands and knees." "Really," said Charles, "now that's a switch! What did she say?" "She said, 'Come out from under the bed, you little chicken.'"
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has 82.65 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, women
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear. He sleeps with a real bear.
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
A man goes inside a pet shop and starts to move around the cages to scout the pets. He sees a monkey with a price of 5000$ and goes to the merchant to ask for details. Hey mister, the monkey…what does it know to worth that much money? Well, it knows Windows 95, 98, 2000, and also knows Word, C++, Visual Basic and last but not least, it knows how to play computer games. - Good monkey, it's worth the money. He goes and finds another monkey with a price of 10000$ and again he will ask the merchant. "What does this monkey know?" "It knows Linux, Unix, Corel and Autocad." "Nice, even I don't know those things." On a last scout run he finds another monkey just sitting there with a price 20000$. The story repeats, and he goes with a lack of confidence to ask the merchant for details. "And what does this monkey do for that ridiculous amount of money?" "I never saw her doing anything, but the other two call her Project Manager!"
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has 82.33 % from 324 votes. More jokes about: animal, IT, management, money, programmer
What do you do when two snails have a fight? Leave them to slug it out.
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing, you just run away.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark? A: A bird that will talk your ear off!
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, communication, parrot
Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
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has 24.26 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why do bunnies have soft sex? A: They have cotton balls.
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has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, sex