''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''
Similar jokes
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Why couldn't the cow leave the farm?
She was pasteurized.
Yesterday I saw a man trying to chat up a cheetah.
‘Hello,’ I thought.
‘He’s trying to pull a fast one.’
Q: What happened when the owl lost his voice?
A: He didn't give a hoot!
Vote:
This guy walks into a bar with his golden retriever.
"Hey, can I get a drink on the house if my dog talks for you?"
"Dogs can't talk, pal. But if you can prove to me yours does, I'll give you a drink. If not, I get to punch you in the nose."
"Okay," says the guy. He turns to his dog. "Okay fella. Tell me -- what is on top of your doghouse?"
"Roof!" The man turns and smiles at the bartender.
"THAT ain't talking! Any dog can bark!"
"Okay boy. Tell me -- how does sandpaper feel?"
"Ruff!"
"What are you tryin' to pull, mister?"
"Okay, okay," says the man. "One more question please.
Okay buddy, tell me -- who is the greatest ball player who ever lived?"
"Ruth."
The bartender beats the heck out of the guy and throws him onto the sidewalk outside of the bar, then throws the dog out next to him. The dog stands up and looks at the guy.
"Geez.
D'ya think I shoulda said DiMaggio?"
Did you hear about the argumentative skunk?
He always liked to make a stink.
Three mice in a pub having a bevy discussing who's the hardest.
1st mouse says I'm the hardest I go up to mousetraps rip the cheese out and as the bar comes down i bench press it 30 times and throw it across the room!
2nd mouse says : you poof! I get rat poison' crush it into powder and snort it.
3rd mouse finishes his drink, gets up and walks to the door, where are you going? asked the other 2.
Home he replied to shag the cat!
Where do cows like to ride on trains?
In the cow-boose.
Why do elephants squirt water through their noses?
If they squirted it through their tails, it'd be very difficult to aim.
Yo mommas so stupid when she licked a dog she said meow.