Chuck Norris has counted to infinity.
Twice.
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Chuck Norris has nicknames for his feet... Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
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The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway.
But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
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15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest?
I don't know he is still busy.
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Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
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You've heard that Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice, right?
Well he's currently making his third attempt.
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Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
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All men are created equal.
Equally inferior to Chuck Norris.
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What occurs twice in The Beginning, never in The End, but is at The End of Everything?
Chuck Norris.
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We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
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Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin.
Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
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