How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three.
One to change it, and two to complain about how bad GE's customer support is.
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On Unix, I always hide all of my personal files in the /bin/laden directory.
Vote:
How do two programmers make money?
One writes viruses, the other anti-viruses.
Vote:
I’ve invented a human computer.
When he does a mistake he blames another computer.
I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.
Why did the Irishman give up internet shopping?
The trolley kept falling off the computer.
A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen".
The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them".
Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
Error, no keyboard.
Press F1 to continue.
A Microsoft support technician goes to a firing range.
He shoots ten bullets at the target 50m away.
The supervisors check the target and see that there’s not even a single hit.
They shout to him that he missed completely.
The technician tells them to recheck, and gets the same answer.
The technician then aims the gun at his finger and shoots, blasting it off.
He shouts back, ‘It’s working fine here!
The problem must be at your end!’