What do you get when you cross an apple with a nun?
A computer that won’t go down.
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99 little bugs in the code,
99 bugs in the code,
1 bug fixed...
Compile again,
100 little bugs in the code.
Which way did the programmer go?
He went data way!
The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.
A computer programmer happens across a frog in the road.
The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week".
The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket.
A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week".
The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket.
A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!"
The programmer smiles and walks on.
Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?"
"I'm a programmer," he replies.
"I don't have time for sex.But a talking frog is pretty neat."
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A computer programmer has been missing from work for over a week.
Finally someone notices and calls the police.
They break down the door of his flat where they find him dead in the shower, an empty bottle of shampoo next to his body.
The programmer seems to have died from a combination of exposure and exhaustion.
The puzzle is explained when the police read the instructions on the shampoo bottle – ‘Wet hair.
Apply shampoo. Rinse. Repeat.’
On Unix, I always hide all of my personal files in the /bin/laden directory.
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Q: What is height of Craziness?
A: Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.
Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
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Q: What does an SEO and part-time chiropractor work on?
A: Your bad backlinks.
Steve Jobs was an amazing man.
He will live in my hard drive forever!
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