Man, to woman, ‘Am I the first man you ever made love to?’
Woman, ‘You might be.
Now you come to mention it, your face does look familiar.’
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
There were two security guards who worked on opposite shifts, but looked after the same building.
Over a period of a year, the night shift security guard noticed that his opposite was putting on weight.
So one evening at shift change, the night shift security guard says to the day shift security guard "Hey buddy, you aint half gettin fat".
To which the day shift guard replies "Yeah, that's because every time I shag your wife she gives me a chocolate biscuit".
She’s like train tracks – she’s been laid across the country.
Yo momma so nasty i had phone sex with her and she gave me an earinfection.
What two things in the air can make a woman pregnant?
Her feet.
Two sperms.
The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?"
The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."
Vote:
Q:What did the black girl say while having sex?
A:Dad get off me your crushing my ciggs.
Man to friend: ‘I read a survey that said half the men in the UK masturbate in the shower, and the other half sing.
Do you know what they sing?’
Friend: ‘No I don’t.’
Man: ‘I thought you wouldn’t.’
Why do so many women fake orgasm?
Because so many men fake foreplay.
The best thing after an intensive argument is the peace-sex.
But I hate when I argue with my father-in-law.
Vote:
A man and his wife go to the doctor to see how they could improve their sex life.
The doctor recommends Viagra.
They come back and see him in a couple of weeks.
The doctor says "how was the Viagra?"
The wife says "great I love it."
Husband says "I like it but it has some side effects, we're bared from McDonald's for life."