The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
Jason Bourne fought Chuck Norris but he can't remember because now he has amnesia.
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
The only reason Godzilla goes back into the ocean is because Chuck Norris is expecting him... for dinner.
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can say never.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Mickey mouse talks like that.
Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.
Chuck Norris finished Minecraft.
Chuck Norris was once shot. The bullet died.