The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
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Chuck Norris makes Power Point look weak.
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Chuck Norris's tears can cure every type of cancer, the only problem is he never cried.
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Chuck Norris can see all 50 states from his house.
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.
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Chuck Norris once stood on a bridge in London.
Then they wrote a song about it.
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Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man".
Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man".
Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".
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Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog.
When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
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Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
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All men are born equal.
Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
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